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FeedPROM.
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I'm going to write a word, and I'd like you to think on it for a second before you go on reading the rest of this post.
Prom.
For many, this word may bring up feelings of nostalgia, happiness, and friendship. For the family and friends of young ladies in high school, it may bring up feelings of terror, dread, and other words that aren't fit for a family publication. I'm aiming this post at those of you who may have some sort of involvement with a young woman heading off to prom in one form or another. If you don't, check back for my next post in which I'll advise you to buy all your clothes in bright colors for this year.
I didn't set out to write on prom or prom fashion until a coworker was telling me a story about a girl she knew who got in a near brawl with her mother over a prom dress in the middle of the Huntington Mall. I'm here today to give some advice on how to avoid such public debacles. For the record, I'm 27, so I'm young enough to understand the prom fashions but have been in the “Real World” long enough to understand the funding of everything that surrounds prom.
The Budget Battle
Obviously, you're going to need to come up with a budget, which is arguably one of the hardest aspects of prom shopping. I did some research on various costs, such as dress prices, limo rentals, dinner, alterations, etc. Here's a sample budget, and you may want to sit down before you read it:
The total cost for this prom is a whopping $1,375.* Do you have to spend near this much? Absolutely not. Sit your daughter down, and discuss your budget. With these prices in mind, tell her the flat amount you can afford and ask her how she wants to allocate. If she is looking at more expensive dresses, would she be willing to give up a limo, manicure/pedicure, not buying new makeup or jewelry, etc.? Expect her to spend every penny. If she's looking at a short dress, she'll probably want to spend more on shoes than if she's wearing a long gown. Since short dresses tend to be considerably cheaper, she can take that leftover money from the dress fund and move it to the shoe fund. Feel free to suggest that, if what she wants will fall out of the budget, would she be willing to make up the additional costs somehow herself? If she's not sure of what she wants yet, that's fine. Just remind her of the budget when she's looking at dresses. You may wince when she falls in love with a dress that takes up 80% of the total budget but keep in mind she's going to have to give up a lot in order to afford it.
One of the best budget tips I've come across when planning for events such as prom or a wedding is the envelope budget. Take several envelopes and write “dress," "shoes,” "tickets,” etc. on each one. Then fill each envelope with cash that you have allocated for it. If you have money left in the shoe envelope, move it to another one where you want to spend more. Once it's gone from the envelopes, you don't spend anymore, period. It's a good way to really realize how much is being spent and how quickly it flies away.
The Style Wars
The second battle that often arises is that of the actual dress. Before you do any sort of prom shopping, check to see if there is a dress code.
Many schools now have dress codes for prom. The dress code may not allow strapless dresses, cut out sections, or slits that go all the way up the leg. Most stores will not let you return a prom dress once it's been purchased, so make sure you're aware of the dress code.
Also, decide what kind of a dress you feel comfortable letting your daughter wear. Are you against plunging necklines or super short skirts? Be as clear as possible so your daughter knows. Look online at websites that sell prom dresses, and print out pictures of dresses you don't approve of, point out what makes them unacceptable, and give them to your daughter. The more information she has up front from you will make shopping much easier.
